Originally from 07/30/07 @ 9:41 PM. Pulled, then re-posted (long story). Please see comments but I do apologize if I offended anyone with the below as that was not my intent.
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Despite the train-wreck that is her life, I’m putting my Pixie Dust towards loving Lindsay. This is a hard one for me, having so predicted her white-trash ways would catch up with her & she’d end up in a mug-shot (again) on Us. However, she hardly needs one more annoying “I told you so,” especially not from someone dedicated (generally) to being a positive voice in the world.
The lost souls of Hollywood, like everyone around us, need our support & good vibes willed their way. Sure, it ain’t easy to muster up sympathy but compassion, compassion I can do. After all, who among us hasn’t had a few too many & ended up on some sort of walk of shame? Ok, ok, so we didn’t do the mad-dash car chase hammered (Thank God) or have coke that was “not ours” in possession en route to incarceration but nonetheless.
So tonight, I gather the goodness within me & send Lindsay, Britney (with her sweet, innocent spawn of K-Fed) & Kate compassion for doing the best they can & hope for the future that they find a better way. Sometimes a girl’s gotta bounce back to rock bottom (a few times) before the message hits home. It took cancer to wake my ass up so I should know. Let’s all pray the hard highway gets shorter even if it takes a miracle. What do you say?
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
This from a friend of mine. I shall address later, when time permits as today’s been all about lessons…
UP,
I wonder where is the love, generosity, open hand, mind, heart? - when writing to and about a a 20 year old kid. you write about her white trash ways, that it’s hard for you. hard, why? beacuase she’s young? beautiful? rich? talented? screwed up? where is the love in that approach? are you not older, wiser, kinder? if yes, isn’t that something to extend to a younger life? erasing it is not the point. confronting your response and post to her issue, i think, is more pertinent. because unlike what you’ve so easily managed to do here (erase), she cannot do the same in her life with all the world’s judgement and eyes on her. especially if you are going to write about “positive vibes”
Are you kidding me? Am I on candid camera or something? Of course no one should really hope bad things happen to anyone. I think UP was predicting, not hoping. But let’s get real here. Are we so hard up for worthy causes to support that we need to steer good vibes to those who can’t take responsibility for their own actions? I’m sure there are pressures that come from limitless resources, fame and good looks. But if a person can’t learn from their own mistake after mistake, maybe need to start owning their situation.
I’m sure I can think of one or two other charities to support that might even appreciate it. If you find yourself in need of other material to fill up your prayers, watch the first 5 minutes of the news, not Entertainment Tonight.
From a Pixie I’m still fixing…
Time has now permitted me to respond with careful consideration to some criticism regarding this post. Again, I apologize for offending anyone with my original comments. It was my first attempt to write honestly about something I feel very conflicted about; While I didn’t necessarily nail it, I certainly learned a lot in the process. Perhaps that’s the point?
My thoughts back to the comment I received:
1) Having been both very judgmental & also hard-living, train-wreck-like myself at times in the past, my self-love & that for LL was not something easily achieved. &, because I’m not Buddha nor Jesus quite yet, (nor am I striving to be), I don’t always have it either. For clarity’s sake, I don’t claim to be any further on my own Pixie path than I am today. To quote Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, “I’m just a fucked up girl looking for her own peace of mind.” But doing it on a blog which ain’t always easy apparently!
2) “White Trash” = not funny. Write & learn.
3) As someone who has escaped many of her own demons (but not ALL of course, being still human over here), I was trying to send well wishes to Lindsay from a place of having been in my own shitty (but far-less public) spot. If my attempt at self-deprecating humor in the post was lost in the judgmental tone of some lines, then that too is unfortunate.
4) I screw up. LL screws up. You, my dear reader, screw up. What I wanted to say was that I wish we didn’t do things that cause us such pain. But, when we do, let’s hope someone can find a place of love for us, even if it’s not that easy for them to do so. Maybe, just maybe, they can do it a bit better than I did? My wake-up call came from cancer -a really, really hard way to get it. While on our own journey, full of lessons to learn any way it takes, I wish it didn’t have to be so hard. I wish treating ourselves like the gems we are came more easily to us all. That’s the real point that got lost. Please love thyself. You. Me. LL. Everyone.
5) My goal (right here, right now) is to try to be a bridge between the world & the woo-woo. Writing about pop culture was an attempt to do that & using straight-talk peppered with profanity is my natural voice. I want to be brutally honest in my blog about where I am - yes, a judgmental bitch at times - trying the best she can to be enlightened & in turn, share that with the world. It’s not all sunshine & light under my hood but I’m working on it. Learning each step of the way is just part of my Pixie Path.
On that note, let’s try to send love (sans judgment) to someone who needs it too, as much as we all do:
* George Bush
It’s not always that easy, is it?
Thanks for reading & making me a better Pixie, dust & all.
“If you find yourself in need of other material to fill up your prayers, watch the first 5 minutes of the news, not Entertainment Tonight.”
My, my. Does this also apply to the UP, I wonder. I actually don’t watch ETonight. My response was about the UP’s words, not LL herself. Read more carefully. Maybe you’ll realize in trying to tell me a thing or two, (”watch first 5 minutes of the news . . .”), you were also putting down the UP, who is the one who chose this topic. Good day now.
Actually it applies more to the UP than to you V. She invited the responses here, not you.
I don’t have any problem when my kids pray, “and help all the people in the world.” I would have a problem if they were to single out Lindsay Lohan. Not because she doesn’t deserve love, grace, attention, but because there are millions of people that need help because they have been thrust into situations they can’t control. She chose her career. She chose to become a role model for a lot of young girls and now is abusing that responsibility. The first place she should receive some attention is from herself, not from me.
Don’t you think if we spent as much time and energy solving problems like Iraq, Darfour, societal inequalities…(I’d even throw in dog fighting well above Lindsay) that we’d live in a far better place. Let Ms. Lohan spend a few weeks on vacation to return with a press conference. “I’m changed woman. Oh, by the way I have a new movie coming out….”
Yes, I do believe the world would be a better place if A,B,C, and D. I’m not given to praying for change, but rather rolling up my sleeves. In other words, I tend to keep my mouth shut, preferring to pitch in my two hands instead of my two cents.
And yes, I think it would be far more constructive to be familiar with certain issues over others. For instance, I am well acquainted with Darfur (although I will admit ignorance regarding Darfour). This past Sunday I and my family were at the vigil in front of the UN protesting against China’s close financial ties with Sudan, which in turn is far too chummy with our government. My sister is given to prayer, and has taught her children the same, while at the same time teaching them that showing and speaking up may yield more fruit than prayer. I’ve been known to show and speak up for other, similar causes.
My protest here was to the cynicism, the lack of generosity - believing that change begins with one’s mind-set, one’s approach to all things, starlets included. You wrote that your reply was directed more to the UP, but it reads as an ad hominen attack directed at me. There were presumptions about how I spend my time. Even in your second reply, the “Don’t you think . . .” presumes you know what I think: it was not a question at all, but a statement.
The cynicism regarding LL toward the end is what I find appalling, and ultimately harmful. It sounds like an unforgiving spectator; one who doesn’t seem to factor in the fact that they nothing about the private life of the child in question. She chose to be an actress, I’m not sure she chose to be a role model. I can’t say as I don’t know her. What I do know is drug addiction is not a joke, or a mere shrugging off of responsibility, but a sign of a much deeper issue than what it sounds like you’ve considered. Lack of compassion is at the root of a lot of wrong in the world, however well-intentioned we like to believe we are. The proof, it’s said, is in the pudding.
Though I’m not writing about LL in particular, it’s still the most time I’ve spent on such a topic. I can’t justify spending any more time on it - I have Darfur, feeding the homeless at my local church (me, an atheist!), etc. on my plate, and other, similar issues that need my time. If anyone’s interested: http://www.savedarfur.org
Well Pixie, it seems like quite a few people don’t like the fact that you are sending out love and support to Lindsay Lohan. For myself, I don’t pay much attention to her or the other “lost souls of Hollywood” as you describe them. However, if I take a moment to stop and think, Lindsay strikes me as someone who is truly lost. She lacks a center, still, and is not yet an adult. She lacks self confidence and self-esteem. We all know a little about such things, but maybe don’t understand what it means to live out all of that testing in the spotlight. Drinking and drugs and fast driving, all that… just manifestations of someone trying desperately to numb the pain in her life.
You know, it reminds me of the old concept of “the worthy poor”, meaning that we should only have compassion for those who are worthy. My guess is that some posters here believe that Lindsay is not worthy, and therefore you should not waste your time on her. Give your compassion to, say, the people of Darfur. Well, I say, compassion is not something that will be used up if you dole out too much. It’s something to be given away for free! Even to Lindsay.
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